Our children are not born to hate, they are raised to hate. – Thomas della Peruta
If you don’t know what “parental alienation” is, you probably haven’t had the pleasure of a divorce with children; let alone the war of a “high profile” custody alien og seeds dispute. Us veterans know exactly what it means–agony for a noncustodial parent and emotional problems for children alienated from a parent.
Parental alienation unfortunately, that is one of those topics that unless you yourself or you are close to someone who has experienced such a thing you probably have no idea what it is. It’s one of those entities of a bigger issue that’s been left out of attention. As child abuse we all know about physical abuse, sexual, mental, and emotional, but parental alienation rarely ever receives the spot light. Unfortunately, in spite of its little attention it is a form of child abuse with a higher rate of the physical forms.
As a result of both of my own children and step-children’s experiences of parental alienation, that after two years later of the signing of papers, which mildly continues to this day, I petitioned the governor of my state for the proclamation of Parental Alienation Awareness Day, April 25th 2011. On March 31, 2011, Oklahoma Governor Mary Fallin signed my proclamation.
Proclamation is defined as: Evidence; The act of causing some state matters to be published or made generally known. A written or printed document in which are contained such matters, issued by proper authority; as the president’s proclamation, the governor’s, the mayor’s proclamation. An act that formally declares to the general public that the government has acted in a particular way. A written or printed document issued by a superior government executive, such as the president or governor, which sets out such a declaration by the government.
Ironically, in spite of the fact that parental alienation is mental and psychological manipulation of a child which drastically harms them mentally, emotionally, and psychology, technically it is not recognized by the American Medical Association and the American Psychological Association. It is however recognized in many other states in the U.S. and in areas in Canada.
Taking a step forward, many courts have acknowledged it, however… There is a fine line as to which either to tread or not to cross when it comes who to protect. Many courts have all but shed the criteria of, “do what’s best for the child,” and adopted the motto of, “let’s do this until you two stop bickering.”
Of course the ultimate goal should be to protect a child from any physically or emotionally/psychologically abusive parent. In some moronic twisted reasoning courts have ordered some children unsupervised visitation with both parents. Why is this moronic? For one, their reasoning. The idea of equal time is to punish the alienating (accuser) while at the same time protecting the child. OK, I can get that. The other is so the accused gets equal time with the intent they are not alienated. I can see how this can help relieve the alienating, but what of any accusations? If there are not any then maybe problem solved. But the ultimate question is whether or not is better or not err in favor of protecting a parent’s relationship with their children, a child’s well-being, punish the accuser, protect the judge, or intervene on behalf of a set of parents and their children.